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I sit here in my room... Time now is 8:38pm in the evening... Don't know what to think but I will find something to type about...

Well here is an interesting topic to talk about and I believe I have talked about this before but only this time I will share more... You guys/girls will read about me in a different light... The type people seldom see...

Here goes...

I suffer from manic depression which basically means when I'm not on medication I get sad/lonely/depressed which leads to me attempting to commit suicide. I have been unsucessfull the past 8 times so there must be a reason I am still alive..

Well how do they treat it? My question exactly... They tend to think that Trepeline in the evening and a Prozac in the evening will make me happy and make me forget about my problems... It does make the world a little bit better to deal with BUT it doesn't make it better. It just numbs you so that you don't care anymore...

I have been to people but what they say and tell me I have done and tried already. All they do at the end of the day is just make things worse... Not better as ones parents might think...

By now you must think "A 20 year old suffering from manic depression - What a joke!". I wish it was a joke but in all honesty it's not a joke. It's reality..

Now put yourself in my shoes... You down the whole day - day in and day out. Then people come along and they drag you down. All you want is to be happy but the moment you think something good is going to come then life throws you a curve ball which just knocks you off your feet and then your down again.

I can in all honesty keep on writing about this but I won't. Just thought I'd share some REAL LIFE with you people....